Posted on 2009.09.21 at 23:52
i almost forgot about this. So many things have happened to me since my last posting. just to refresh my memory i remember back in march when things between me and my "friends" and the person i was somewhat dating ended up screwing me over yet again. not to mention those "friends" of mine are not my close friends. we talk occasionally but i cant relate to them and i know they cannot relate to me. we are very different people and thats just how things are meant to be.
other than losing touch with the people i once surrounded myself with almost everyday, i can finally say that i am feeling very happy and on i am finally on a good path. there are somethings here and there that really make me angry or sad but i think thats what needs to happen for now. i just hope it doesnt progress into anything worse. i dont want to go back to a few months ago where i was thinking of nothing and feeling sorry for myself. i wasnt even myself 3 or 4 months ago. the drugs were really taking over and i can see that now that i am drug free. my only problem now is that it has really affected my sleeping. i used to not be able to sleep a few years back but now its getting to the point where i fall alseep but i wake up 20 or 30 different times during the night. hopefully something changes.
i also met someone on the day of my birthday. his name is ethan, and he is perfect for me. i am so happy to have met someone like him.
Posted on 2009.02.19 at 09:09
I've never felt this way about another person. Ever.
how should i tell him that i'm totally falling for him?
Posted on 2009.01.22 at 08:10
Current Mood: just woke up
i keep having these strange vivid dreams. the ones where you are frightened of everything going on around you. i wont get into detail but lately they have been scaring the shit out of me. i realize that dreams are only our sub councious and most likely mean nothing at all but i cant help but think that lately all the dreams that i have been having all link together and are trying to tell me something. the only thing i cant figure out is if it has to do with my past, my present or my future. maybe these dreams dont even mean anything at all. i guess i should get a pen and a pad to put next to me while im alseep. maybe then will all of this make sense to me.
Posted on 2009.01.13 at 21:24
Current Location: seattle, wa
Current Mood: excellent
Current Music: aesop rock
for the past week i have been in Seattle with narissa. Shawna was so nice and offered to let us stay with her. it's been really great. for awhile there i was feeling jaded and i my perception was a mess. being here, being away from everything i was so accustomed to back at home has really helped me to see things from a different point of view. I feel extremely happy and so grateful that i was able to do this for myself. i've gotten to know shawna and i also met some of her friends. i think shawna and everyone i have met are sooo great and so much fun to be around. i cant even express how happy i am to have had the opportunity to do all of this.
sooo tomorrow is the day we go back home. so sad, but also ready to go home. i have everything packed and ready to go. our flight leaves at 3:00 or 3:30. we'll have to bus it downtown and then go under to the tunnel and catch the 194 to the airport. i've had such a fun time exploring the city and catchin all the buses around here, getting stuck inside of that park, taking all sorts of pictures, space needle, goin to that house and experiencing some drama(its life), getting a tattoo with narissa, the movies valkerie and curious tale of ben button were amazing, shopping, homeless people, eating whatever we can find in shawnas house, meeting all of her friends, getting to know her, everything about this trip was an incredibly fun experience worth doing again. i will definitely be back here when the weather is better.
unfortunately it didn't snow here. that is my ONLY disappointment and i put myself close to debt by coming here but i dont even care. it was SO worth it.
Posted on 2008.12.20 at 16:49
i feel good
Posted on 2008.11.01 at 13:37
i dont know
Posted on 2007.10.09 at 17:18
Current Music: elliot smith
my previous entry was about work. i went to that meeting even though i was throwing up and had a fever only to find out that the meeting was canceled. nobody even called me and they all know i live in napa. i was so angry
i am not sick anymore and i had the day off today which was really nice. ill be going to sushi at seven with narissa. i would have asked sam to go with me but he hasnt even called me back from a long time ago and i figured narissa would have liked to go. i think sam went to sf, so maybe thats why he hasnt called in awhile.
earlier today i cleaned out narissa dresser and her nightstand because she is getting new ones. she has so much stuff i still dont know where to put it for now. i also only cleaned it out so i can get my bed :) i could only get it if the dresser and night stand are thrown out. i want that bed now because im tired of sharing one with narissa. yeah i share one.....it drives me insane when i cant sleep cause she is moving around all night and then i move around at night so she moves around. haha its ridiculous.
so for Christmas i was thinking of getting dad a laptop. and for narissa naiomi and mom i still have to think about......
sam will get a late bday present and an early xmas present because im not sure if hes going to be here.
Posted on 2007.10.07 at 11:45
i have to go to work for a meeting in calistoga at 4:30. which means that i have to leave at 3:30 and it doesnt end until 5:30 which also means that i wont be back until 6:30. 3 hours only to hear bullshit from my coworkers who are having drama with each other and i have absolutely nothing to do with it. gotta love work
Posted on 2007.10.03 at 23:58
why do people have to be so mean?
Posted on 2007.09.25 at 22:07
Current Mood: happy
i saw eastern promises and now i want to see another movie this weekend. i love movies!